#### Even Some More Tales from
## Castle Balderstone
Good evening. My name is Ryan Veeder.
(You should open <a href="https://rainymood.com/" target="_blank">Rainy Mood</a> in a separate tab.)
It is my great pleasure, in this festive and frightening season, to welcome you to Castle Balderstone: America’s legendary hotbed of horror, a treasure trove of the morose, macabre, and monstrous.
[[I’m on the edge of my seat!|introgame]]
[[I’ve heard this speech before.|introsmarm]]
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document.getElementById("shortcut").innerHTML = "<a href=castlemap.html>I’ll just skip to the castle map if that’s okay.</a>";
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</script>You’re not in a seat yet. You are walking—with me, Ryan Veeder, through the halls of Castle Balderstone. The castle’s crooked pinnacles slash blasphemously against ever-present clouds; its grim silhouette is a stain of absolute blackness in the midst of a black sky.
Each year, the greatest spookcrafters working in the English language assemble in Castle Balderstone’s drafty halls to test their latest material on the only audience possessed of hearts so inured to terror as to withstand the absolute scariest stories—each other.
Tonight, you are my plus-one to this wedding of the weird and the wicked.
[[Eek!|scaredguest]]
[[Please don’t phrase it that way.|waryguest]]
[[Let’s get going!|eagerguest]]I know you’ve heard it before. I give the same speech every year. It’s a tradition.
If you’re so tired of my chilling introductory monologue, I suppose you already know what I’m going to say next?
[[“Its cyclopean crenellations loom like pitiless headsmen over rain-soaked courtyards.”|speech1]]
[[“Its gargoyled belfries quiver in silence beneath violent winds and peals of thunder.”|speech2]]
[[“Its crooked pinnacles slash blasphemously against ever-present clouds.”|speech3]]Ha! Afraid not! I barely ever describe anything as “cyclopean.”
Anyway:
Its crooked pinnacles slash blasphemously against ever-present clouds; its grim silhouette is a stain of absolute blackness in the midst of a black sky.
Each year, the greatest spookcrafters working in the English language assemble in Castle Balderstone’s drafty halls to test their latest material on the only audience possessed of hearts so inured to terror as to withstand the absolute scariest stories—each other.
Tonight, you are my plus-one to this wedding of the weird and the wicked.
[[Eek!|scaredguest]]
[[Please don’t phrase it that way.|waryguest]]
[[Let’s get going!|eagerguest]]Incorrect! But “gargoyled” is a pretty good word. Hmm.
Anyway:
Its crooked pinnacles slash blasphemously against ever-present clouds; its grim silhouette is a stain of absolute blackness in the midst of a black sky.
Each year, the greatest spookcrafters working in the English language assemble in Castle Balderstone’s drafty halls to test their latest material on the only audience possessed of hearts so inured to terror as to withstand the absolute scariest stories—each other.
Tonight, you are my plus-one to this wedding of the weird and the wicked.
[[Eek!|scaredguest]]
[[Please don’t phrase it that way.|waryguest]]
[[Let’s get going!|eagerguest]]...Well, it’s a lot easier to guess when it’s multiple choice.
Anyway, Castle Balderstone:
Its crooked pinnacles slash blasphemously against ever-present clouds; its grim silhouette is a stain of absolute blackness in the midst of a black sky.
Each year, the greatest spookcrafters working in the English language assemble in Castle Balderstone’s drafty halls to test their latest material on the only audience possessed of hearts so inured to terror as to withstand the absolute scariest stories—each other.
Tonight, you are my plus-one to this wedding—
[[—of the weird and the wicked.|interruptguest]]Eek is right, pal!
Indeed, as we ascend the winding stairs of Castle Balderstone, the wind outside howls in warning, and the temperature drops until your teeth chatter in the cold—or is it in anticipation of the horrors you are about to witness?
We trudge through antique galleries, across musty hallways and down forgotten corridors. The occasional window offers no view of a friendly outside world, but only confirms what your aching legs and ragged breath have already predicted: that the labyrinthine architecture of Castle Balderstone is one you can never hope to escape. Nevertheless we step on... Oh, heck.
[[What’s wrong?|whatswrong]]I’m not trying to imply anything! I’m speaking purely figuratively.
This relationship isn’t going to work if we don’t trust each other, okay?
As we ascend the winding stairs of Castle Balderstone, the wind outside howls in warning, and the temperature drops until your teeth chatter in the cold—or is it in anticipation of the horrors you are about to witness?
We trudge through antique galleries, across musty hallways and down forgotten corridors. The occasional window offers no view of a friendly outside world, but only confirms what your aching legs and ragged breath have already predicted: that the labyrinthine architecture of Castle Balderstone is one you can never hope to escape. Nevertheless we step on... Oh, heck.
[[What’s wrong?|whatswrong]]We’re almost there. I just have a couple more paragraphs left:
As we ascend the winding stairs of Castle Balderstone, the wind outside howls in warning, and the temperature drops until your teeth chatter in the cold—or is it in anticipation of the horrors you are about to witness?
We trudge through antique galleries, across musty hallways and down forgotten corridors. The occasional window offers no view of a friendly outside world, but only confirms what your aching legs and ragged breath have already predicted: that the labyrinthine architecture of Castle Balderstone is one you can never hope to escape. Nevertheless we step on... Oh, heck.
[[What’s wrong?|whatswrong]]//Okay I get it you know the speech.// I’m still going to say the whole thing though.
As we ascend the winding stairs of Castle Balderstone, the wind outside howls in warning, and the temperature drops until your teeth chatter in the cold—or is it in anticipation of the horrors you are about to witness?
We trudge through antique galleries, across musty hallways and down forgotten corridors. The occasional window offers no view of a friendly outside world, but only confirms what your aching legs and ragged breath have already predicted: that the labyrinthine architecture of Castle Balderstone is one you can never hope to escape. Nevertheless we step on... Oh, heck.
[[What’s wrong?|whatswrong]]Well, 2021 is the bicentennial of Castle Balderstone, and they’re doing this big deal of a thing with a whole different setup, so we’re not convening in the same library we usually do.
I forget where we’re supposed to be.
[[Are we lost?]]We are KIND OF lost. I still basically know where we are. And I have a vague idea of where we’re supposed to be. There was a map on the invitation. We just have to trudge through a couple more antique galleries.
[[Did you bring the invitation?]]//No I didn’t bring the invitation.// It’s fine. It can’t be too far. There’s only so much castle in here.
[[What’s that over there?]]What are you talking about?
Oh!
That is the Blood Moon of Gascogne. It looks like a ruby, right? But it’s actually a red diamond—the rarest color of diamond. Melvin Balderstone bought it for his wife Catherine in 1788—before this castle was even built. Melvin’s will forbade his heirs from having the gem’s value assessed, but unofficial estimates range from six to eight million dollars.
This is the first time it’s been on display since Lindsay Hepworth-Balderstone’s funeral in 2004!
[[How do you know all this stuff?]]I’m just reading the plaque on the other side of the display case.
If this is being exhibited for the bicentennial, then the convocation must be somewhere nearby.
[[I think I hear voices over there...]]Well then lead the heck on, Macduff!
I should explain something before we get there. Because there are so many people here for the bicentennial, we’re not having just the one meeting where everyone presents their stories one after another.
Instead, they’re doing something called “breakout rooms” where each presenting author has their own little area, and everyone else wanders from room to room, and supposedly this gives everyone a chance to enjoy every blood-curdling story. I don’t know if it actually works but that’s how they’re doing it.
(link: "I can probably handle that.")[(goto-url: 'castlemap.html')]